The crucial days

The crucial days

When character tests

Are either passed or failed

The crucial days

When friendships can last

Or they just catch the wind and set sail

The crucial days

When the faults you find

Land on your own doorstep

The crucial days

When your eyes open

And your legs keep moving you forward.

Don’t stand still.

The stillness kills.

It suffocates your very will.

Don’t stand still.

Choosing to focus on Gratitude

It’s been a tough month. Travel, work, a beloved pet passing, a parent suffering a major fall, another parent moving to full nursing care, selling a parents home, moving all the old stuff, family drama, and I got out of balance and tried to cook my way into a sense of normal.

The sorrow, knowing that my dad will pass soon.

The sorrow knowing my mother in law will pass soon too.

The sorrow over the loss of Rascal.

The swamping, suffocating feeling of helplessness, as things have to be done, now, not later.

It Steals my motivation, energy, and care.

There’s So Much Talk Of Being Wild

https://scurvyq52.wordpress.com/2019/03/15/theres-so-much-talk-of-being-wild/
— Read on scurvyq52.wordpress.com/2019/03/15/theres-so-much-talk-of-being-wild/

CaptainQ had this post this morning. He’s talking about how people on social media appear perfect, and work hard to adjust the perception all the time with their perfect punctuation, pictures etc. It was the right post, at the right time for me. I think I’m a wild and free individual, but maybe I’ve focused on keeping my image a little too “perfectly punctuated.”

I try to keep things reasonably light, and my purpose is to focus on gratitude. I’m not grateful For everything, but I find ways to focus on the good things in my life when the circumstances I’m (neck deep) in aren’t always good.

To drag myself out of the swamping emotions, and feelings of helplessness I choose to be grateful today for:

  1. A really sweet phone call from my husband this morning.
  2. The rain is gone for today, I’ll get to see the sunshine
  3. Time to exercise
  4. My warm and comfy home
  5. My job
  6. Our other dog, Dolly, is eating more, and she seems to be coming out of her sorrow over Rascals passing.
  7. The opportunity to be good to someone today.

Thanks for taking time to read, and I hope wherever you might be, that your Friday is Fabulous.

What are you grateful for today?

Not changing my clothes

A couple weeks ago we went to see ELO.  https://wendysharesathought.com/2018/08/11/elo-the-jeff-lynn-tour

Wardrobe……clothes…..decisions…….being a girl……..

It was a great night, a great concert, a much appreciated time away from work, house, dogs, bees, etc.  There was just one little hitch that made made me a little upset with myself.

I got myself ready to go to a Rock Concert.  I hadn’t been to one in quite a few years, and I wanted to look, ‘rockin’. So I got myself together, and came out to join my husband and son and got this:

And this:

And Silence…….until my son nudged his father, and said ‘way to go dad’. ‘Say something nice quick.’

He couldn’t. He didn’t.

It was a little too late at that point. I went and changed. Then I was mad at myself.

I should have worn what I wanted. Mainly because Boys are dumb.

That’s it for the mature assessment of the situation. 😆

Next time, I’m not changing.

Cheers to getting my confidence back.

My Over 50 Rockin Look. Ta da.

Grateful for supportive friends

  
Image credit:  sun gazing

Thanks everyone for your awesome support as I struggled through my recent challenge.

With every opposition, I know I’m getting stronger and more capable of facing these interpersonal issues.  I’m better at letting go of anger, and forgiving hurt.  My recoveries are getting faster, and my ability to be effective in resolving conflict is getting almost….masterful.  I think that’s because of your association, I’m more confident in who I am.

Because of you all, and your wonderful blogs I’m finding the very best in me.  

Thank you all.

Today I’m most grateful for my wordpress family.

My Ponytail drip

  
Yesterday ran like a bad movie that wouldn’t stop.  

In my bull headed fashion, I pushed back with all my might and ended up a mess by the end of the day.  Exhausted, weepy, and grouchy…the trifecta of fun for my family.

When the movie threatened a double feature on me today, I put on my ” Oh, Hell No ” tee shirt and headed to Zumba.

Pony tail drip achieved, sweaty hugs to all my gal pals, and something good happened to me when I got home.  I was able to put on some slacks that hadn’t fit in 6 months.  They zipped without pinching.  Yea Zumba!

Why didn’t I try on those pants yesterday?  I could have had my “something good” a day earlier!  

Happy Wednesday!

Reflections

it’s been a week.  

After witnessing the community outpouring for Deputy Goforth.  After going to a funeral with 11,000 people.  Seeing the beauty and strength of a young mother, widowed too soon.  Seeing lovely children send their father off with tribute.  After loving up my family and letting them know how much I appreciate them…….it happened.

A whiner.  A complainer.  A dark cloud of negative energy imposed themselves into the sunshine that I had walked myself.

I have something special for them .

  
Cheers to keeping complaints to yourself.  You have no clue what someone next to you may be going through, as I have no clue.

I’m so grateful today for clearer perspective, a smidgen more wisdom, and an opportunity to give to someone else’s life.

Isn’t that what it’s all about?  Isn’t it about what we give?  What we sow?  

What if the Random Act of Kindness we give was the ultimate reward we receive?

What would you do different?

Please share. 

Happiness Sunday

It’s raining again.  Outside and in.

I reach for my uplifting songs, and I’m pleased that I don’t cry through all of them.

When the bad thoughts, doubts, fears, and self harassment stampede through my mind, I have to ‘on purpose’ start saying good things out loud.  I have to push the harassment aside, push away the darkness, and say loudly the good things that I want to focus on.

Part of my ritual when things get dark, is to sing.  I had to find some happy songs.  Most of these have been very popular, most of them are silly, but they do distract.  I like the Minions in the Happy Video, I always smile at the Minions.

Here’s my list:

Pharrell Williams:  Happy

Taylor Swift:  Shake it off

Meghan Trainor:  All About that Bass

Bruno Mars:  Uptown Funk

Today I’m grateful for rain, cleansing rain.  I’m grateful I can sing songs of praise, and songs of happiness.  I’m grateful for the strength to clean my house.  I’m grateful for my heart beat, and a physical body that works.

Push

Push away the negative talk:

You can’t do it.

They don’t want you.

You aren’t enough.

Push away the memories:

Your shoulders are stooped.

Your skin looks terrible.

You are sharper than swords, and ready to fight.

No one wants you around.

Push away the image:

You are fat.

Your hair is gray and falling out.

Your don’t belong.

Push to the light:

You are enough.

You have enough.

You do enough.

Push till you can’t hear them anymore.  

 

Warriors

To meet a warrior, is a special experience.

To hear a warrior tell his story is humbling.

  
When he pulls his breath in sharply through his teeth, and clamps down on visible emotions running across his face….we all held our breath, then I wept.

  
To watch a warrior laugh with his friend gave me a glimps into a special world.

  
To get an autographed copy of Lone Survivor, my husband will be jealous. 

Shaking the Warrior’s hand, and saying thank you seemed like the most paltry response to such an overwhelming sacrifice of blood, bone, and limb.

Emotionally wrecked after 2 hours of Chad Flemming and Marcus Lutrell…..we are so fortunate to have such men serve to protect our nation.  The situation deserved some serious quiet reflection.  

The most poignant question asked by Marcus Lutrell was “why are your friends, your friends?”  He went on to propose that you don’t really have good friends, until you go through something tough together.  Marcus, had and has some tremendous friends.

If you ever have the opportunity to see either of these Warriors speak, regardless of your political view, their human experience, and their drive to succeed, win, and overcome terrible obstacles is inspiring.

Five Photos, Five Stories Challenge: day one

thanks Elizabeth from teandpaper.com for your invitation!  It is an honor and I hope to live up to a smidgen of your talent.  

The “challenge”. Post a photo each day for 5 consecutive days and attach a story to the photo.  It can be fiction or non-fiction.  Elizabeth’s photos are outstanding.  She studies the art, and is a credit to it.  I’m humbled to get to sharpen myself, and apprentice along. Please, if you haven’t visited her blog…you should, she is an amazing talent.  teandpaper.com

the moon in the magnolias

Dusk in the south is sticky….humidity high and Mosquitos out everywhere.  The whir and buzz of their blood thirsty wings can’t stop me from looking at the moon.  

The same orb that influences the tides, pulls us body and soul.

The same moon that reflects the the light gives me hope that the sun will come up again. 

There will be a new dawn.

Peace my friends.

Thanks for letting me participate.