Thinking

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Me, last year.  My professional photo for my dream job.

Confidant, happy, fit, sassy (photoshopped kindly by my photographer)….ready to run and succeed.  I had two job offers at once, and was overwhelmed at the choice to make.  I made the wrong choice.  Looking back with regrets, I slap myself to look forward.  Those days are behind me, and what’s done is done.

This year:

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Sweaty, bug bit, no makeup, but happy.  Looking to start over again professionally, but allowing myself the time to do it right this time?  Is there such a thing as ‘doing it right?’  It’s such a leap of faith to go out and put yourself on the line again.  Do I really want to be part of a ‘ground breaking team’?  Ground breaking is damned hard work.  It’s a marathon, it’s messy, its frustrating…..and I’m beginning to wonder if my marathon days are behind me?  I’m looking at three companies.  All would require me to use my contacts, my reputation, and my work ethic to make money for them……What if I change my story?

What if I take the rest of the year off, build up my skills in a new area?  What if I change the way I start over, and not run back to what I know?  If I have to start over anyway….why not change my story?

It’s amazing how a year can turn everything, upside down.

Today, I’m grateful for the time to think, the resources to teach me how to think better, and time to make the right choice.  Eanie, Meanie, Miney, Moe…..ME!

Maybe it’s time for me to realize it’s OK to choose Me.

Jesus help me.  Amen.