Tomorrow is another day, Scarlett

The email and texts continue. Since last March, Desperate, dramatic plea after plea for campaign money fills my inboxes.

I can’t count the number of emails that I’ve unsubscribed, and they just keep coming.

If they don’t have enough money by now, it’s just not going to happen.

Tomorrow, the Mid Term madness will have some sort of conclusion, and maybe my email will settle down.

OMg, it’s only 12:30 on a Tuesday

I’ve been running since yesterday morning, tearing up my To-Do List, attending meetings, working out, cooking, cleaning, doing the NAPMW financial report for September, conference calls, reports, having sushi with my buddy Kimberly.

I looked at the clock a few minutes ago…….It’s only 12:30 on a Tuesday and I’ve done enough in a day and a half that it is justifiably Thursday morning at least. Just saying.

Can I just skip ahead? Can I pass Go and collect my $200 please?

Is there a magic rule?

There is something about real life, and trying to spend time with someone.

One of the things I wanted most from my parents was that they spend time with my children and get to know them.

I’m beginning to wonder if that was just an odd request from me.

Being near family, I am starting to realize that not everyone wants time.

I’m here to spend it, but there doesn’t seem to be much interest. My son is busy, my brother is busy, my sister in law is busy, the kids are busy, busy, busy, busy, busy……. We’ve only had this trip planned since April.

I’m glad my VRBO is cheap, and close to where I need to be.

Hanging out until the birthday party tonight and watching something really sad on Netfix. I hope it goes well tonight. I’m ready to go home.

Gifts are cheap when not wanted.

Summer colds winter remedies

A clingy cough, fever and chills won’t budge with the codeine cough medicine prescribed last week.

The 48 hour virus has outlived itself three times. I’ve fired my doctor.

Now I’ve brought out the big guns to banish this woeful condition.

It’s quite effective. I have to say.

My ears stopped hurting, my nose cleared, my cough calmed down….and I’m entirely relaxed, or just exhausted from coughing for the last 5 nights.

Today I’m grateful to be on the mend, and for the Rye whiskey I found buried deep in the cabinet above the refrigerator.

I don’t care for hard liquor. So instead of plain water, I made some chamomile tea, and added some extra lemon.

Picking up or dropping off?

Went out front and this was parked outside……the engine was running, but no one in the truck.

It got me thinking:

Where do they take it?

How does the interview go for that job? “How long have you been in the poop business?” “We provide you with the truck, qualified leads, and your own scoop and gloves.”

Can you imagine the stories that they tell about the size of the piles?

I’m not sure which neighbor they were servicing, but I just had to wonder how spoiled we have to be?

This just goes to prove that there is a job for everyone.

Crazy Cardinals

We have a good number of Cardinals hanging out this summer. They are so pretty.

I didn’t realize how aggressive the females are, until I started hearing this noise, like pebbles being pelted at the window.

I walk outside to see if the bird died from the impact, but no. There she was poised on the Rose bush, watching her reflection and ramming the window!

Looking things up, I saw several articles on aggressive female cardinals. Who knew?

We’ve never had that issue before. Maybe she’s hit her head one too many times?

Crazy bird.

Image from Pinterest.

Foggy days-daze

Ever have one of those ‘foggy’ days, when thoughts are fleeting and lost?

Yesterday I was in a foggy daze.

I got lost.

I got found.

I messed up every time I turned around.

It’s not me.  That’s not who I am.

Who is it then?

Shaking off the fog, I was watching myself as if I was someone else.

I had to laugh at myself to keep from a dark and sinister condemnation.

What is worse then tearing your own self down?

My big challenge:  to speak to myself, about myself, in caring and supportive tones.

That’s not easy.

But…..(don’t you just cringe at the but?)

BUT!  I am sharp, well thought out, decisive, articulate, funny, resourceful, practical, forgiving, and kind.  I am confident, capable, well able to get from point A to point B without getting lost.  I see detail, and have a great memory.  I don’t fail, I learn.  I can do this, even when it’s foggy.

Do you ever have to stop internal dialogue?  How do you turn it around?IMG_2216

image from Pinterest.


I forgot the 4th Ninja Turtle’s name, or Random Wandering Thoughts

One of those sleepless nights, where the mind wanders.

We had found a new series on Netflix on the de Medicis.

Quite a few Game of Thrones actors in this one, and just as political and scheming.

After tossing and turning I started thinking about the DaVinci series that came out a few years ago.

This deMedici doesn’t feature Leonardo DaVinci, but it does have Donatello as one of the artists of the age.

So my active, intellectual mind segued right into cartoons as I tried to remember all the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle characters.

I couldn’t recall Michael Angelo.

I will have to write Netflix and see if they can’t put together a series on the other Italian Artists so I can keep my Turtles straight.

I’m going back to bed now.  This seems like a really odd dream.

A goodbye note from a friend

A had a friend.  We met when we were 18.  We’ve been in and out of each other’s lives since 1983….that’s a long time.

We looked alike, went to college, shared clothes, cars, friends, horses, drinks, laughs, hard times, fun times.  Now she’s gone.

Not dead, she’s decided not to interact anymore.  She’s pulled herself away, and refused to interact with me, except for an occasional “like” on Facebook.  I asked her why. 

She emailed a response.

“I have searched for an answer. What comes to me is that I am paralyzingly unsettled by intimacy. I believe that is why I have no friends. The moment I meet someone with whom I might connect, everything inside of me pulls away until I am so uncomfortable around her that it’s easy to not be.

For me, you epitomize intimacy. Everything about you calls to me, invites me to open up, expose who I am. I want you to know me…and that wanting terrifies me. And because, in my darkness, knowing me makes you less. So, I have the shallow relationship with you that social media allows. I get to be connected to you without ever having to truly connect.

None of this factors in your feelings or needs. By not doing so I perpetuate my self fulfilling prophesy that I am fundamentally characterless.

I’m sorry and appreciate that you forgive me…because that’s the kind of person You are.”

That’s one of the most grandiose ways I’ve seen to say” F’off. I’m broken and only want to watch you on Facebook, and the last 33 years…just kidding.”

I sure can pick friends.  I might have to reevaluate my selection process.