Slowly fading

It’s been a really wild 30 days.

I’ve put so much out- professionally, personally, family-wise.

And it’s all been for nothing.

All the effort, commutation, travel, planning, all of it.

Now it’s all turned to nothing.

I think I will take some time off, and just refocus.

I chide myself….what was I thinking?

I’m grateful to wake up and move on.

8 thoughts on “Slowly fading

  1. It may feel like it all turned to nothing, but you put yourself out there, you gave of yourself. Some good will come of it even if you can’t see it now. I always said, “I can take the hard times at work. I can take the hard times at home. But when they come at the same time, it is just too much!” So, right now, it is just too much. Do what you said–step back. Regroup. Rest. Then, when you are ready, put yourself out there again. You are strong, and the sun will shine again.

    • Sometimes the farming work of getting out there, breaking up the hard ground of relationships, and then waiting… seems like a waste of time. Time that I’m not sure will ever be reciprocated.
      But in the balance, it’s not my job to make people feel or do, it is just my job to care.

  2. Is it really your job to care? I’m talking about when it comes to bringing home a paycheck only, not about family, though even then it sometimes is not our job to care. I wish I could think of a better word for our responsibility, or what we owe our family members, in those situations.

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