A volunteer garden of gorgeousness

A couple years ago, I had planted some seeds for a Bee friendly garden. It’s died out a couple of times.

For some reason (my guess is our wet and cold winter) the flowers came back with a Volunteer Verve!

I think the black eyed daisies would have taken over the entire side yard if we hadn’t mowed them. Fun and Festive!

41 years of Star Wars

Yesterday, I got done at the office around 1:30. I ordered a curbside grocery pick up but couldn’t fetch it till 5.

What to do until then? I didn’t want to go home, so I looked for a movie.

The first time I saw Star Wars was in 1977 at the theater (it was the only way to see it at the time). I was 13, my brother was 9. It was magical. We loved every minute.

In 2002, at the 25th anniversary of the movie, they put together new scenes, added CGI, and my brother and I went back to celebrate. We loved every minute.

This year, as I sat in the theater for the 2:20 pm showing with 10 other die hard fans, the opening script rolled and I was 13 again, but missing my little brother. I had to text him as soon as I got out of the movie.

Ron Howard did a great job on the film, and it was so great to see actors enthusiastic about their parts, instead of hating them.

I’m a fan of the series. This new chapter did not disappoint. I loved every minute. And that’s not something I can say for every chapter, but every chapter has brought back wonderful memories.

Bloody toes, entertainment beasts, clandestine garbage

1994, one of the first purchases we made was a 36″ TV. Sold on the color quality, and it’s ability to record in Stereo to the VCR.

Well howdy, is there a better sales pitch?

I had a terrible time giving this monster up. It’s hard to count how many Disney, Pixar, and other movies I watched with my boys on my lap. How many games on the Nintendo 64, Game Cube, XBox, we all played together.

Jungle Book, Beauty and the Beast, Mary Poppins, Tarzan,Little Mermaid, The Incredibles, Shrek, Brave, the Sword and the Stone….Mario Cart, Banjo Kazooi, Legend of Zelda, Halo were all played over and over on this outrageously heavy, faithful, hub of entertainment.

We upgraded to DVD, then Blue Ray. All was well. There was no HDMI cable but who cared? This was the Hub of our entertainment.

The poor old beast recently passed. We had a small ceremony. We all said goodbye, in our own unique way.

Unfortunately, the disposal of the beast was left up to me and my youngest son. We carted it to the curb for big trash day. I hobbled away, pierced by the dolly as we hefted it off the little truck we used to wheel it out of the house.

My bloody toe prints still on the tile….because I’m too ticked off to clean them up.

I’m grateful today for our “heavy garbage” pick up. I’m grateful that I could sneak the beast out of the house before my husband could make an excuse to keep it.

I may be in trouble when my husband finds out that I got rid of the TV. I left some blood evidence behind, just in case I go missing, and someone needs to know where I’ve been! Hopefully it won’t come to that. He should really thank me that I saved his back. Just saying.

I miss old technology, but not the weight behind it. Oye. My toe needs to stop bleeding.

Oh Wednesday

I learn so much from my dog.

If he can’t eat it or play with it, he will just pee on it and move on.

Great dog theories on life.

Love my Rascal boy. Isn’t he beautiful?

And he never lets me go to the bathroom by myself, especially in a thunderstorm.

What a dog.

Rain

There is something great about a southern storm. The thunder, the wind changes direction, the sky darkens, and you can smell the rain before it starts.

The humidity is heavy, until it breaks and the lovely rain falls.

The rain is amazing.

Sneaking in while she’s not looking

Last week was hairy, stressful, and fraught with challenges.

I’ve had a difficult relationship with my dad since he disowned me a few years ago. That sounds weird, right? Why am I spending time with someone who disowned me? That’s a long story about my son’s pace maker, and my controlling step mother who wanted attention over the situation. It was the final straw of a long string of narcissistic behavior, and I put my foot down. So now I’m out of the family.

My dad and I talk on the phone occasionally. But that’s been the extent of our contact for the last few years except one brief visit in February of 2017.

He’s in declining health. His wife was needing a break from taking care of him, and my brother was going in for a few days and asked if I wanted to visit while she was away.

When I got in town, I was instructed to go to the main gate of the community where he lives to pick up a gate pass. When I pulled up, the attendant was adorable and was so excited that I was there as a “surprise” for my dad. I got my gate pass and headed to his condo. I parked in the driveway and called my brother to make sure it was ok to go up.

The last time I saw my dad was over a year ago, and his wife would only give me 30 minutes with him, and hovered without giving us a chance to speak without her in the room. It was a terrible visit.

As I got to the stairs to his 2nd story unit, my brother came out on the porch so exited. “Dad, look who’s here!”

My dad made his way to the porch, way too thin, a little too shaky, but happy to see me.

A surreal moment. He cried, and kept staring at me. He kept calling me beautiful, and apologizing for staring. He also kept saying ‘I’m so happy for how you’ve turned out’. I’m not sure what that means to him, and I really didn’t want to ask. I just held his hand and asked about him.

I cried, my brother cried, I think the neighbors cried. It was a weepy community by the end of the day.

My dad is suffering from dementia and Parkinson’s, but mostly I think he suffers from boredom, inactivity, and a controlling wife.

We ate, laughed, reminisced, but he got tired quite often, and he would nap. We tried not to wear him out.

When his wife called on Wednesday night, he covered for me, and didn’t tell her I was there. That shocked me.

The Jig was up on Thursday, and he didn’t remember to keep my presence from her. The trouble was soon on, and my brother did a magnificent tap dance session to calm her down.

I left on Friday happy to have had some time with him. I may have to continue to sneak in, and it might be more difficult next time, but I’m up to it.

An old Polaroid from 1979.

Tony-Good Guy. “Good Guy” because my dad has always been a very snappy dresser. He always had on his Gucci. Gucci shoes and belt had the GG on them. If anyone ever asked what the GG stood for, he never said Gucci, he said it meant “Good Guy”. He will always be Tony-Good Guy to me.

Unexpected, but totally appreciated

I’ve not been myself lately. Too much on my plate, and I got distracted, and a little careless. Careless is not a word associated with me, usually.

Last week, I sent a signed Real Estate listing agreement to myself, instead of the realtor. I meant to send transfer statements to my financial guy, but forgot the attachments.

This week, I left my wedding ring in my hotel room while out for the day making sales calls.

I left my tablet at the TSA point in LAX.

When I realized I left my wedding ring behind, I called the hotel to cancel maid service, but the room had already been serviced. I sent up a quick prayer.

To my delighted surprise my ring was right where I had left it. I indeed left a nice tip for the cleaning lady, and will contact the hotel chain to express my appreciation.

When I realized that I had left my tablet behind, I hoofed back to TSA (who were exceedingly kind) but no one had turned it in. One of the agents went to look at the security footage, and as I waited, another of the Agents walked past me carrying my tablet.

They were so nice about everything, and I walked away saying a prayer of Gratitude.

It’s so easy to berate myself. I’m a seasoned traveler. I know better. Why I’m so scattered right now? I’ll just have to chalk up to stress, and too many irons in the fire.

I’m so grateful for the kindness and goodness of the people I’ve been around this week. Amidst my distractions, I’ve been so blessed that my blunders haven’t cost me. I’m so grateful.

This could have been an extra frustrating trip, but thanks to the goodness of people, it ended up making me smile, count my many blessings, and Thank God for the good people he put in my path.

I’ve got sunshine on a funky Friday.

It’s been a tough week.

Things are never so difficult as dealing with your own mind.

That’s where the battle is won, in the mind.

The battles fought in the mind are horrific, and long.

Sunshine is the best remedy.

Flowers are cheer for the soul.

I’m so grateful to live where I live, in the sunshine, an in abundance of flowers.

Ah Ha moments

Have you ever noticed patterns?

Patterns of behavior? Patterns of situation?

Yesterday started well enough, but I found myself irritated beyond measure by 3pm.

So I went back in my journal and found that mid-month this year has been fraught with consternation, frustration, and stupid situations.

Since there is no longer a biological reason for this in me, it really has me wondering what is causing this mid-month moodiness and grief.

(Image from Pinterest; Kush and Wisdom)

It was difficult to stay silent. It was difficult to understand the boiling in my soul.

Today isn’t much better, but at least I have calmed down enough to apply some logic and analysis to the consternation.

Recognizing the pattern actually gave me some relief, because now I can work against it and try to break the cycle.

Today, I might be boiling, but I am grateful that I have found the pattern, and that I can work to break it.