Searching for the motivation in the midst of disappointment isn’t necessarily difficult. I’m over my surprise, and practicing the gratitude of letting go. Everyone has the right to their own choices, and I’m grateful that I too get to choose. My choices count, and I can go where I’m celebrated without rancor. I’m still disappointed that my radar and intuition failed me, but it stings less today.
It’s amazing what a good workout will do to help release some of the hurt.
I’m grateful today for the people who love me, who “get me”, and laugh with me over my quandaries.
There is no fool like an old fool….crap! I hate being the old fool.
It’s humbling when I come to the realization that what I have perceived is not real, the people I really liked, were not forthright, and that I had no clue as to the duplicity. Nothing on the radar, no ‘gut’ instinct, just a stupid happy grin on my face thinking everything is fine. I’m picking myself up off the ground, humbled, humiliated, and not sure what to do from here. Wow….just wow. What is real? What is real? Where did my radar go?
Recently I had a little debate over the power of words. Many I know don’t agree with me. That’s ok. We will just have to disagree. I can attest to the fact that words matter. Tone matters. Intent matters. I’m one of those damaged children breaking out of the cocoon binding me into what really matters. As the damage falls away, I fly a little better.
Language is the basic element that makes us most like God. We speak our future, we speak our atmosphere, and what comes out of our mouths shapes our futures.
My family has taught me the importance of words, and how not to use them. My friends have shown me grace with their words. My friends have shown me awesome grace and encouragement.
So I’m grateful today for the good words spoken over me. I’m grateful for the lessons learned from the bad words spoken. I’m most grateful for the words I can read daily that my Heavenly Father has spoken over me that feed my hungry soul.
I’m grateful for the lessons that shape my life.
I have always observed that change is the only thing we can count on. Nothing ever stays the same.
I recently made the decision to change jobs. Not that anyone in the mortgage industry ever escapes, we are in for life. Mortgage is what I know, and now I have the opportunity to be on the ground floor of a new correspondent division for an independent company. I wasn’t really even looking for a new job…..it just appeared, this wonderful opportunity. I’m very blessed to have friends who recommend me.
The thing about starting over is that it is hard work. It’s going to take some time to get to know the new system, the overlays, the culture, and bring the clients on board. I’m not afraid of working hard, and so far everything seems to be coming together for our August launch.
So I’m set and determined to move forward boldly. Although change is constant in my life, I don’t like it. The ‘not liking’ won’t make any difference. I just have to keep moving, grateful that I’m able to be employed during this time of high unemployment. I’m confident that all will be just fine.
Today it’s time to celebrate a fresh start, breath in and out, and look forward in confident hope to the success in my future.
Riding the Blue Ridge
What an interesting week! My husband and I took our first vacation in 10 years this last week. The first vacation without children in 20 years. Isn’t that something? I don’t know if it’s sad, or good, or a combination of the two. Don’t judge us too harshly on that statement. We always took our ‘vacation time’, but it was generally used for hunting, or projects, or visiting family. Visiting family is a kind of vacation, but not in the truest sense of what I consider the definition of a vacation, which is to get away from what is familiar, normal, and work related.
So we did a true vacation. We got away from what was familiar, normal, routine, and work related. We drove with two other couples to North Carolina, and rode motorcycles. We rode the Dragon, Moonshiner’s Run, The Blue Ridge Parkway, Hell Bender, and a little road from the Parkway called State Highway 80. That was our favorite.
We rode in Georgia, Tennessee, and North Carolina. We saw waterfalls, and road in the clouds. We went to a motorcycle museum. We went to the top, and bottom on the Fontana Dam. With all the rain, it was amazing.
We employed ‘redneck’ ingenuity into a situation that allowed us to continue riding.
Yes, it’s a doctor pepper can clamped to a motorcycle exhaust pipe.
There is nothing as frustrating as a break down far from home. However, there is nothing as grand as finding a fix (as odd as it might be) so that everyone can continue with their ride. We can truly say that we rode the Dragon, following a Dr. Pepper Can.
We met the kindest, most friendly people. The mountains were beautiful. It rained on us just about every day, but we didn’t care. Everywhere we stopped it was lovely.
I learned how to take video, and how not to take video, so we got some really cool footage of Moonshiner’s Run, and The Dragon. I learned so much on this vacation, I can say that it made a big impact on my life, my views, my beliefs, and my strength as a person. I learned what I can do better, because I made some mis-steps last week. I learned that you don’t put dish soap you use in the sink in the dishwasher. I misread the label. There was an unfortunate suds incident…..my fault. I learned to laugh at myself a little better. I’m pretty funny sometimes!
We won’t wait another 10 years to get away. That was a promise that my husband and I made to each other. It was really good to escape the heat of S. Texas, and get to the mountains. I really liked those mountains.I’m grateful for the time away, the friends, the experiences, the laughter, the lessons, and I look forward to our next adventure.