The journey to Gray;

It’s been 18 months of going blond, going short, then growing out,

It’s been a painful process. Long, arduous, exhausting, and often frustrating process.

Do I like it? I don’t know. It’s a big let down.

I like not going to the Salon every month to have my roots colored,

I like that the gray is silvery, not yellow and snaggey.

I think I will have my hair stylist give me some more highlights in front to take some of the frump out.

Maybe a purple streak?

Hair is frustrating.

But I’m grateful to have hair to fuss over.

My busy hands

Do you ever have those creative bursts of energy and end up with a lot of soap and lotion bars?

Well maybe you have your own brand of goodies that you crank out?

Maybe you garden, or do cross fit?

Maybe you do volunteer work?

When you have these creative bursts, are you completely wiped out when it’s over?

My plethora of soap, and lotion bars are packaged up and ready for distribution to my clients.

I really need a nap.

Grateful today

It’s a very humid Sunday morning in H’town.

But I have a smile on face,

Sleep was sweet last night.

Waking and feeling really rested.

Time for prayer,

saying Thank You for all the blessings in my life.

Time for coffee,

Messages from friends.

My list for the day is prepared, and all the better for starting my day with

Gratitude.

Cooking

Cooking it does soothe my soul.

Creating something that brings our little tribe around the table.

The silence of the first few bites.

Medium rare perfection.

I’m grateful today for sleep, energy to prepare a meal, good grill pans, time around the dinner table with my husband and youngest son, and a great butcher at my grocery store. What a fabulous filet!

Perfectionist’s Escapee.

Image from Pinterest:

It was a difficult lesson to learn.

I never understood why I was never enough,

Nothing ever good enough,

There was always a flaw.

And that was always the talking point.

The shame I felt growing up, carried through too long.

Overcompensation became the driving force.

Be better, do better, fight harder, hide, hide hide. Be two people, the real one, the fake one.

Hide the failures, don’t speak of the pain, don’t bring up how you feel…

Don’t ever show weakness…Don’t let anyone know if you screwed up.

Lessons learned, don’t pass on the curse of the perfectionist.

Guard the boys, lift them up, show them it’s ok to learn from mistakes, and how to deal with failure. Make sure they know that they are more important than any possession, any material object. They are the treasure, they are my treasure.

Perfectionism, I spit on perfection. It’s an illusion. Needy people who drag down anything around them so that they can feel superior. Vampiric in nature, demanding, drowning, desperate to stay perfect, destroying anything that comes in her path.

For as many years as I’ve been free from the Vampire, when I’m weak, tired, or struggling, she sits at the window and laughs at me, demanding that I take her back.

She doesn’t know that I can still resist her. She is the lesson, and when she comes to call, she is the exercise equipment that I use to continue to keep her in my rear view mirror. She strengthened me, and continues to strengthen my resolve to stay free from her grip. She has already lost. I no longer fear my failures, imperfections, or mistakes, I now can laugh at them.

Which Way Photo Challenge 5-16-19

Is it Thursday again already? Oh my goodness.

Thanks Beach for hosting this weekly photo Challenge! Please check out his blog for some really awesome photos, and fun challenges.

Roads, bridges, walkways, signs, stairs, freeways, etc. Here’s my take on it this week. The dry and the wet places I’ve been.

Refrigerator Art

Some of the treasures I got to bring back from Phoenix, was a little Art work and some photos to display on the fridge.

Handprints from the niece and nephews, and a couple of school photos.

It’s so nice to have such treasure to display again.

Storms.

I have been a bit challenged in trying to post this video. I cant hear the audio, and the thunder is magnificent.

Hope you can get the full effect.

My boys and how we roll, Tolkien, Rowling, and Martin.

Like when they were little, getting them still for a photo was OH SO CHALLENGING! But so much fun.

Getting them out to watch a movie with me was an even greater fete. My Mother’s Day wish was to see Tolkien, The movie with them. That was it…a movie with them……

My oldest, on the right, was really protesting. He was not in to going to see it, which had me baffled. He’s been the Tolkien fan since he was 12. He read my copy of the Hobbit, that I had kept from 7th grade.

I remember reading it for the first time, and loving every page. I never stopped reading Tolkien in every form. I watched every movie, every cartoon, every screen play, everything I could ever consume, and I shared it all with my boys.

I played the Momma card, “it’s Mother’s Day”, the only thing I wanted was to go see the movie with both boys. I traveled to Phoenix to do it, I wasn’t giving up. I shouldn’t have had to work so hard to go to a movie…..I was kinda grumpy about the resistance, I have to say.

At the finish of Tolkien The Movie, we just all sat there….weepy, and overwhelmed at what we had experienced. We had some time, just the three of us to hang out and discuss what aspects of Tolkien, The Movie, we enjoy the most, which books brought us the most joy, and which Movie adaptations of Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit we liked, and why. Why the Hobbit, The Movie, didn’t need Legolas! Lot’s of Eye Rolling was done by all, let me tell you.

Why Tolkien, was the premier author who brought books to life along with their own culture and language that he had created….and how he might have inspired JK Rowling to create such a great culture and language in her books too.

Then we went back to my Brother’s house to suffer through the latest episode of Game of Thrones. It’s not Tolkien, by a long shot. Darn it. But George R. R. Martin did create cultures and language and lots of death and destruction in his novels too. My oldest and I both read the first 7 books of Martin’s before Game of Thrones made it’s debut. HBO tried hard, but it didn’t mark the majesty of the books, or the goodness of the characters he developed.

Have you ever had the joy of sharing one of your passions with your kids, and see them enjoy it too?

There is nothing that has made me a happier mom, then to have my boys love the same authors that have brought me joy. It gives us soooo much to talk about.